Saturday, August 12, 2006
the fucking cutting edge people
okay, i have days were i'm not too pleased with myself, but today i have to tell you all that i am actually living on the cutting edge and you should all come to me to find out what you should be reading, if you too want to live on the cutting edge.
there have been a few times in the last few months where i've practically broken my arm patting myself on the back for knowing what shit to read first - mostly because The Believer magazine is the cutting edge as far as i'm concerned and often over the past few months i've already read, purchased, or am about to purchase a book that they are talking about, reviewing, etc.
so i always get a little sad when i think i've fallen off the cutting edge. but today, today was a fucking day for the cutting edge and me. mcsweeney's quarterly no. 20 arrived this week (which i'm so excited about it's almost as good as being a kid again at christmas before i realized i didn't believe in much anymore) so i'm thumbing through the COMPLETELY FUCKING BEAUTIFUL production values (and i'm sure beautiful writing as well - just haven't gotten to it yet) and i see in the back they've included an excerpt from Chris Adrian's new book the Children's Hospital which is apparently being published by the brilliant mcsweeney's. so now i have to tell you, my fine readers, to go read my april blog (i think april 1 actually) titled "a better angel". after you do that you will understand why i get to say...
"i am the fucking cutting edge people, the cutting edge!"*
*this of course applys only to books - and really only fiction - as i seem to be woefully undereducated in every other subject matter i encounter :)
there have been a few times in the last few months where i've practically broken my arm patting myself on the back for knowing what shit to read first - mostly because The Believer magazine is the cutting edge as far as i'm concerned and often over the past few months i've already read, purchased, or am about to purchase a book that they are talking about, reviewing, etc.
so i always get a little sad when i think i've fallen off the cutting edge. but today, today was a fucking day for the cutting edge and me. mcsweeney's quarterly no. 20 arrived this week (which i'm so excited about it's almost as good as being a kid again at christmas before i realized i didn't believe in much anymore) so i'm thumbing through the COMPLETELY FUCKING BEAUTIFUL production values (and i'm sure beautiful writing as well - just haven't gotten to it yet) and i see in the back they've included an excerpt from Chris Adrian's new book the Children's Hospital which is apparently being published by the brilliant mcsweeney's. so now i have to tell you, my fine readers, to go read my april blog (i think april 1 actually) titled "a better angel". after you do that you will understand why i get to say...
"i am the fucking cutting edge people, the cutting edge!"*
*this of course applys only to books - and really only fiction - as i seem to be woefully undereducated in every other subject matter i encounter :)
Thursday, August 10, 2006
the descent
i like scary movies (even though i'm a total chicken). however, i am not really into the whole gore/torture fest that has somehow become scary movies lately. the whole, we won't bother with any kind of intelligent storyline, or setting any kind of tone, and we'll just make it as horrifying and disgusting as possible and that will make it worthwhile even though the shit isn't actually "scary".
so The Descent? not one of those. this movie rocked. it was one of the scariest movies i have seen in a very long time. people are comparing it to Alien, but i gotta say it scared me far more than Alien ever did. it's not perfect, few movies are, and i have some problems with it, but overall it was a great horror movie. it did an incredible job of setting things up an knocking them down. i was left thinking about it for days. the very tail end was my least favorite bit, but typical of horror these days i guess and not enough to spoil the movie overall.
a great all female cast. one complaint (which could have something to do with my turning 30 recently - i'm willing to concede), there is a scene that implies that these women (6 of them) are all under 25 - or rather that one has turned 26 - making the rest under 25. this annoys the crap out of me. all these women are sexy strong and ultimately very watchable, is there a reason the audience has to believe that they are a nubile 22 instead of a wild 30? is that really such a problem? anyway, the movie was fucking good, go see it. and prepare yourself to be tense and scared before any "monsters" even arrive.
sidenote: i'll be shocked if Natalie (Jackson) Mendoza is not a star shortly. she is incredibly easy on the eyes. you like her even when you're supposed to be hating her, and it's not even due to bad acting. she's just that fucking good looking.
so The Descent? not one of those. this movie rocked. it was one of the scariest movies i have seen in a very long time. people are comparing it to Alien, but i gotta say it scared me far more than Alien ever did. it's not perfect, few movies are, and i have some problems with it, but overall it was a great horror movie. it did an incredible job of setting things up an knocking them down. i was left thinking about it for days. the very tail end was my least favorite bit, but typical of horror these days i guess and not enough to spoil the movie overall.
a great all female cast. one complaint (which could have something to do with my turning 30 recently - i'm willing to concede), there is a scene that implies that these women (6 of them) are all under 25 - or rather that one has turned 26 - making the rest under 25. this annoys the crap out of me. all these women are sexy strong and ultimately very watchable, is there a reason the audience has to believe that they are a nubile 22 instead of a wild 30? is that really such a problem? anyway, the movie was fucking good, go see it. and prepare yourself to be tense and scared before any "monsters" even arrive.
sidenote: i'll be shocked if Natalie (Jackson) Mendoza is not a star shortly. she is incredibly easy on the eyes. you like her even when you're supposed to be hating her, and it's not even due to bad acting. she's just that fucking good looking.
Saturday, August 05, 2006
i hate the french update
great news!
I Hate The French (for the record my first submission of short fiction ever) has been accepted to Pearl and will appear in their Spring 2007 Fiction Issue (along with a little bio about yours truly). i can't tell you how excited I am about this. it's a great step forward, even if it pays nothing (which is does - pay nothing - but a copy that is). of course i will casually avoid telling you that my other piece (2nd submission ever) The Sink Is Made of Foam, was rejected by Swink :( too bad. i'll have to keep trying with those guys over at Swink. so far they are definitely not fans.
Issues and subscriptions to Pearl can be found and ordered here: www.pearlmag.com
also, Agressive Behaviour 2 (AGBE2) will be coming out soon - in the spring perhaps? And will feature two of my pieces Stitching and He Said.
AGBE2 will be available through Bottle Of Smoke Press. www.bospress.net
I Hate The French (for the record my first submission of short fiction ever) has been accepted to Pearl and will appear in their Spring 2007 Fiction Issue (along with a little bio about yours truly). i can't tell you how excited I am about this. it's a great step forward, even if it pays nothing (which is does - pay nothing - but a copy that is). of course i will casually avoid telling you that my other piece (2nd submission ever) The Sink Is Made of Foam, was rejected by Swink :( too bad. i'll have to keep trying with those guys over at Swink. so far they are definitely not fans.
Issues and subscriptions to Pearl can be found and ordered here: www.pearlmag.com
also, Agressive Behaviour 2 (AGBE2) will be coming out soon - in the spring perhaps? And will feature two of my pieces Stitching and He Said.
AGBE2 will be available through Bottle Of Smoke Press. www.bospress.net
maui
i just got back from hawaii.
it was insanely beautiful and a well deserved (and necessary) break for me. i am of course barely tan (which looks absurd after spending 8 days at a beach house) as my paler than pale complexion forces me to use sunscreen with an spf of like 50 for the first few days. and then when i finally lower the spf i generally just burn my ass and if i'm lucky it fades into a brief barely visible tan. anyway, i posted a few pictures, the two up right now are views from the incredible beach house we stayed in. i actually spent most of my time there, but did tear myself away from the view and sounds of the ocean long enough to go to a great luau, do the "road to hana thing" (a beautiful adventure) and take in a sunset cruise. it was a great time. and over far too quickly. the next time i go though i will either be flying first class or moving to LA before taking the trip as the flight from NYC is BRUTAL. look for the airline rant in a later blog. i'm hoping i can resist writing about it, but the horror is still pretty fresh in my mind so we'll see how that goes...
one thing i have to say is that i am sad to learn that i cannot just enjoy myself sometimes. there i was in this incredible paradise and i could not separate myself from the whole notion that this is an amazing culture and land that has been completely raped by the tourism industry. if i was a local i would spit on tourists every chance i got for fucking everything up. they crowd up the beaches and all the nature trails, all with their whinning and bitching and idiotic questions; the cost of everything is sky high (gas is a whopping $3.80 a gallon); and the need to make money off of the tourists has required that the hawaiian people make a disneyland out of their culture and traditions. As much as I enjoyed the luau and learned quite a bit I could not ignore the fact what they were "performing" for us was really dumbed down and made "tourist friendly". i was wishing i could get the real scoop. this of course did not stop me from buying a million little souvenirs, mostly for others, and mostly it turns out, made in china or india. sometimes japan.
all that said, anyone who goes is lucky to get the opportunity. it's a beautiful place and the people are surprisingly beautiful in mind and soul considering the above (although there is obviously some deep resentment as you cannot ever be considered a local - even if you are born there - if you are white. you will always be a "haole". i find this to be incredibly small minded, but considering all i've said above i guess i can't blame them for the feelings of resentment. if i had to deal with idiot tourists in my town (island!) 24 hours a day my soul would be even blacker than it is already.
it was insanely beautiful and a well deserved (and necessary) break for me. i am of course barely tan (which looks absurd after spending 8 days at a beach house) as my paler than pale complexion forces me to use sunscreen with an spf of like 50 for the first few days. and then when i finally lower the spf i generally just burn my ass and if i'm lucky it fades into a brief barely visible tan. anyway, i posted a few pictures, the two up right now are views from the incredible beach house we stayed in. i actually spent most of my time there, but did tear myself away from the view and sounds of the ocean long enough to go to a great luau, do the "road to hana thing" (a beautiful adventure) and take in a sunset cruise. it was a great time. and over far too quickly. the next time i go though i will either be flying first class or moving to LA before taking the trip as the flight from NYC is BRUTAL. look for the airline rant in a later blog. i'm hoping i can resist writing about it, but the horror is still pretty fresh in my mind so we'll see how that goes...
one thing i have to say is that i am sad to learn that i cannot just enjoy myself sometimes. there i was in this incredible paradise and i could not separate myself from the whole notion that this is an amazing culture and land that has been completely raped by the tourism industry. if i was a local i would spit on tourists every chance i got for fucking everything up. they crowd up the beaches and all the nature trails, all with their whinning and bitching and idiotic questions; the cost of everything is sky high (gas is a whopping $3.80 a gallon); and the need to make money off of the tourists has required that the hawaiian people make a disneyland out of their culture and traditions. As much as I enjoyed the luau and learned quite a bit I could not ignore the fact what they were "performing" for us was really dumbed down and made "tourist friendly". i was wishing i could get the real scoop. this of course did not stop me from buying a million little souvenirs, mostly for others, and mostly it turns out, made in china or india. sometimes japan.
all that said, anyone who goes is lucky to get the opportunity. it's a beautiful place and the people are surprisingly beautiful in mind and soul considering the above (although there is obviously some deep resentment as you cannot ever be considered a local - even if you are born there - if you are white. you will always be a "haole". i find this to be incredibly small minded, but considering all i've said above i guess i can't blame them for the feelings of resentment. if i had to deal with idiot tourists in my town (island!) 24 hours a day my soul would be even blacker than it is already.
at the risk of...
...making this a fanboy blog devoted entirely to the walking dead i still must post that walking dead 29 was fucking great. as always i am a giddy school boy counting down until the next issue. make it august kirkman. make it august.
(spoiler below)
and don't count glenn out just yet. crying and pissing yourself is what any of us would do in his fucked up position. doesn't mean we wouldn't be a badass in the final analysis. i think glenn will find the badass in himself as well. and i think the govnenor putting glenn in a cell next to michonne and letting him hear what is happening to her was the worst mistake he could have made, short of raping and torturing michonne in the first place. and if you think glenn already spilled his guts i suggest you read that shit again.
also, on a slightly (very slightly) differnt note. i just realized in issue 29 in the letters pages that kirkman is only 27 years old. what the fuck? what have i been doing with my life?! jesus.
(spoiler below)
and don't count glenn out just yet. crying and pissing yourself is what any of us would do in his fucked up position. doesn't mean we wouldn't be a badass in the final analysis. i think glenn will find the badass in himself as well. and i think the govnenor putting glenn in a cell next to michonne and letting him hear what is happening to her was the worst mistake he could have made, short of raping and torturing michonne in the first place. and if you think glenn already spilled his guts i suggest you read that shit again.
also, on a slightly (very slightly) differnt note. i just realized in issue 29 in the letters pages that kirkman is only 27 years old. what the fuck? what have i been doing with my life?! jesus.
i can't believe it has to be said again, but it does...
the walking dead fucking rocks!
c'mon people - how much does this book rock?!
i tore through issue 28 like i was a little kid again. found myself skippping ahead and having to calm myself down and go back and read every single word.
i'm in love.
c'mon people - how much does this book rock?!
i tore through issue 28 like i was a little kid again. found myself skippping ahead and having to calm myself down and go back and read every single word.
i'm in love.
random sj thoughts...
the closer i get to sending superhero junkies out into the world the more i wonder about what will come.
ironically while i pray to be freed from my current pathetic existence with a money heavy book deal followed by a film option (where the REAL money seems to be) i admit that the things that make my book more accessible and mainstream are the very things i keep trying to edit out. i wish i could find the happy medium where it could be a successful cult classic (geek love? i wish it would be that good!) and also something that i can be proud to have birthed.
ah, such a tangled web.
ironically while i pray to be freed from my current pathetic existence with a money heavy book deal followed by a film option (where the REAL money seems to be) i admit that the things that make my book more accessible and mainstream are the very things i keep trying to edit out. i wish i could find the happy medium where it could be a successful cult classic (geek love? i wish it would be that good!) and also something that i can be proud to have birthed.
ah, such a tangled web.
superhero eyes
i went to the eye doctor this week to get my eyes checked and get a new pair of glasses, having lost mine in december returning from christmas vacation. think i put it off long enough?
so, i went to a doctor and everything was normal until she put me in front of this little device - i think maybe she called it an auto-refractor? i could have that wrong. anyway, you basically sit in front of this little machine and look in and there is a picture (mine was a blurry image of a red barn in a field) and supposedly the machine registers your eye and then moves the image out of focus and in focus back and forth i guess changing the focus of your eye and measuring some very scientific eye stuff. so my new doctor and i tried this on my eyes about ten times without success. she admitted the machine was finicky but said it had never failed to eventually work. after about a dozen tries and the machine continuing to say "cannot find eye" she called in the front desk girl. this girl took my place in front of the machine and her eye was "found" in about three seconds. now i'm a little concerned. so we try me again. no luck.
we then move on to the other tests, my doctor assuring me that everything is fine and verifying that my eyes are in fact okay. she even said they were just a "truly lovely blue - a beautiful eye" (how nice! this from a professional eye-looker!). so at the very end we tried me again at the machine twice more. still "no eye found".
she admitted before i left to pick out new frames that when she looked through her end of the machine she saw something she had never seen before...where my pupil was she saw a vapor or mist coming off of them. WHAT?! VAPOR/MIST COMING OFF OF MY PUPIL IN THE SPECIAL EYE READING MACHINE?!
upon returning home and relaying the story to my roommate and boyfriend they confirmed what i'd been thinking the whole time, "Baby, you're a superhero." Of course I am. Just wish i knew what my special vapor/mist eyes can do...
sidenote: of course my mother had a different take - "time to go to a different doctor asap."
mcsweeney's
how badass is mcsweeney's? i recently started reading the believer from mcsweeney's (courtesy of the boyfriend) and am loving it (although i admit it sometimes shamefully over my head - but this is a good thing i suppose because if you always read things you understand instantly then you are destined to never learn more). anyway, the believer is awesome, and mcsweeney's quarterly concern i've known about (and loved) for awhile simply because of chris ware's guest edit of issue 13 (also thanks to the boyfriend). however, dustin long's book Icelander is my intro into the world of mcsweeney's book publishing efforts. how fucking beautiful is this book. i am stunned everytime i pick it up. as my boyfriend said, "it just begs to be read." i admit that i have yet to get too far into it (i'm only on page 29) but honestly it could be a bad read and i'd still be glad i picked it up. it is the defnition of beautiful original printing in a world filled with crappy lame ass covers and production values. i mean how many more covers can that person who illustrated the cover of the devil loves prada do? if i see one more of those covers that looks almost exactly the same and that leaves the impression that exactly all the same crap is inside i'm going to throw up.
but perhaps i should be thankful that the cover so clearly alludes to the weakness inside - maybe it saves people like me from mistakenly purchasing it.
back to the point. mcsweeney's and icelander. so far icelander is wonderful, original and unique, totally living up to the cover, but regardless i am thankful for mcsweeney's existence as it drags the world kicking and screaming one book at a time into a world i actually want to live in.
but perhaps i should be thankful that the cover so clearly alludes to the weakness inside - maybe it saves people like me from mistakenly purchasing it.
back to the point. mcsweeney's and icelander. so far icelander is wonderful, original and unique, totally living up to the cover, but regardless i am thankful for mcsweeney's existence as it drags the world kicking and screaming one book at a time into a world i actually want to live in.
superhero junkies
i just finished the first draft of my novel Superhero Junkies.
everyone please hold your breath while it is previewed by a few good friends i know with sharp eyes and red pens. sometime after they hack it to bits and i stitch it back together i hope to get it out there into the world.
i feel good. i feel like maybe i haven't been wasting every weekend that i've spent inside instead of outside with the rest of the world for the last six months.
well, let's hope it wasn't a waste.
xavi is right - 22 (april 22nd!) is a good number :) maybe it is my lucky number too...
everyone please hold your breath while it is previewed by a few good friends i know with sharp eyes and red pens. sometime after they hack it to bits and i stitch it back together i hope to get it out there into the world.
i feel good. i feel like maybe i haven't been wasting every weekend that i've spent inside instead of outside with the rest of the world for the last six months.
well, let's hope it wasn't a waste.
xavi is right - 22 (april 22nd!) is a good number :) maybe it is my lucky number too...
i hate the french
i submitted my short fiction piece I Hate The French last week to Pearl Magazine. everyone cross your fingers and toes - it's my first short fiction submission ever. although i also submitted that same week to Swink my piece called The Sink Is Made Of Foam - so I guess they're about a tie for first.
i've had a little bit of poetry submission succes but i always feel like such a charlatan every time i submit a piece of poetry - hell every time i write a piece of poetry. i don't read much of it and while there is some really great work out there most of it doesn't grab me and move me as i feel it should if was a real poet. and my favorite stuff (spoken word/slam) i feel i don't see enough of and feel woefully unqualified to write in the first place.
now short fiction, there is another story. i devour short fiction like it is water, or air. more like air actually since i never seem to drink as much water as i am supposed to.
so it suddenly seems very important waiting for that acceptance or rejection letter. with poetry it always just seemed like another piece of paper.
i've had a little bit of poetry submission succes but i always feel like such a charlatan every time i submit a piece of poetry - hell every time i write a piece of poetry. i don't read much of it and while there is some really great work out there most of it doesn't grab me and move me as i feel it should if was a real poet. and my favorite stuff (spoken word/slam) i feel i don't see enough of and feel woefully unqualified to write in the first place.
now short fiction, there is another story. i devour short fiction like it is water, or air. more like air actually since i never seem to drink as much water as i am supposed to.
so it suddenly seems very important waiting for that acceptance or rejection letter. with poetry it always just seemed like another piece of paper.
the books have me...
i think maybe if people would leave me alone that is all i would do. read books.
i don't even know if i'd write anymore. because as much as i love it, it is never as innocent or ultimately as fulfilling as reading. so if i wasn't trying to be a "writer" so that i didn't have to be "something else" maybe i wouldn't do it at all - maybe if i didn't have to "be anything" i would just read.
maybe sometimes i would take a break and draw too. drawing is good.
i don't even know if i'd write anymore. because as much as i love it, it is never as innocent or ultimately as fulfilling as reading. so if i wasn't trying to be a "writer" so that i didn't have to be "something else" maybe i wouldn't do it at all - maybe if i didn't have to "be anything" i would just read.
maybe sometimes i would take a break and draw too. drawing is good.
the walking dead
a little behind lately, so i just read the most recent walking dead issue (thanks solely to the generosity of the boyfriend). must say, this book rocks so hard. every issue just drives forward like madness. i love it.
i love the idea of re-inventing the world. i guess that's why apocalypse shit always appeals to me - it's always the chance to start from borderline scratch and rebuild through all the shit. and it is such a fantastic way to explore characters - because nothing reveals truth in a character more than new situations. how a body deals with change and survives it is so fundamentally interesting to me.
of course i myself would never survive the apocalypse. i have no skills. i would have to become some kind of new world disease-riddled whore or something (by that i mean i would likely become diseased - not that i am diseased now you see - oh who cares). anyway, basically nobody is going to need me for anything else. here - "write some stories - entertain us" or "organize my life and make my office function beautifully" yeah right, more like, "spread your legs if you want to eat this week". so i suppose, for my sake, apocalypse is best left on the page.
i love the idea of re-inventing the world. i guess that's why apocalypse shit always appeals to me - it's always the chance to start from borderline scratch and rebuild through all the shit. and it is such a fantastic way to explore characters - because nothing reveals truth in a character more than new situations. how a body deals with change and survives it is so fundamentally interesting to me.
of course i myself would never survive the apocalypse. i have no skills. i would have to become some kind of new world disease-riddled whore or something (by that i mean i would likely become diseased - not that i am diseased now you see - oh who cares). anyway, basically nobody is going to need me for anything else. here - "write some stories - entertain us" or "organize my life and make my office function beautifully" yeah right, more like, "spread your legs if you want to eat this week". so i suppose, for my sake, apocalypse is best left on the page.
a better angel
i read a great short fiction piece in the new yorker this week. it's called "A Better Angel" by Chris Adrian and the writing style is just beautiful. and funny without being obvious and trying to hard. just by being a great character piece that gets you involved enough with the characters that you know when its funny - nobody has to hit you over the head with it. i love that. here's a little bit of it - one of many brilliant little bits -
"the angel was done up that day in the dress and skin of a chinese girl - sometimes her form obliged my fancy, though i knew i could not control it, having tried to make her take on the shape of a dog or a corncob by staring at her and concentrating until she told me to stop it."
love it!
that said, sometimes the new yorker misses - i am still trying to get through their fiction piece from the week before - hoping, praying, it will pay off. it has yet to - and i've maybe lost interest by now.
anyway, Chris Adrian apparently has a novel "The Children's Hospital" coming out in the fall. i intend fully to check it out - so should you. also of note is that Amazon lists another book by Adrian called "Gob's Grief" - but something about it sounds like maybe it's not the same guy. can't be sure though. anyone know for sure?
"the angel was done up that day in the dress and skin of a chinese girl - sometimes her form obliged my fancy, though i knew i could not control it, having tried to make her take on the shape of a dog or a corncob by staring at her and concentrating until she told me to stop it."
love it!
that said, sometimes the new yorker misses - i am still trying to get through their fiction piece from the week before - hoping, praying, it will pay off. it has yet to - and i've maybe lost interest by now.
anyway, Chris Adrian apparently has a novel "The Children's Hospital" coming out in the fall. i intend fully to check it out - so should you. also of note is that Amazon lists another book by Adrian called "Gob's Grief" - but something about it sounds like maybe it's not the same guy. can't be sure though. anyone know for sure?
poll
is "you have really beautiful eyes" actually code for you have a really beautiful something else? i ask mostly because when i heard this i was really tired (i.e. bloodshot and puffy) and i'd spent most of the day not looking in this person's eyes and instead bending over or under or crawling around things on the floor, so i have doubts this really had anything to do with my eyes.
it was actually really nice to hear regardless.
i'm not nice enough to my eyes anyway. perhaps i should give them more credit.
it was actually really nice to hear regardless.
i'm not nice enough to my eyes anyway. perhaps i should give them more credit.
dilemma (okay, it turned into another rant - but i swear it didn't start that way)
i feared a few months ago i'd lost my sense of humor. which was a big loss. as i really do enjoy a lot of great laughing. fortunately it came back a few weeks ago - just like a inoculation in the arm - suddenly things seemed funny again in life.
i consider myself a person not easily offended because in some way life is always funny - i don't care how tragic - there's always funny in there somewhere. there has to be - otherwise how would we possibly get through the day?
a guide for my sense of humor: family guy is hands down the best show on tv. please read into this mostly that i am an equal opportunity offender - nobody is exempt.
so here's the problem - you must make fun of and offend equally - otherwise it just looks petty and 'unfunny'. but this sounds rather serious and 'unfunny' in and of itself doesn't it? i recently lectured (unfairly) my boyfriend for accepting a friend request from a t-shirt company that has a myspace profile, because while some of their t-shirts were funny they seemed to only pick on two groups. fat chicks and gay people. suddenly this doesn't seem funny to me. it's only funny really if you insult everyone - or if you would given the chance.
that is what is so great to me about family guy, south park, aqua teen hunger force, harvey birdman, the daily show, etc. they are equal opportunity offenders. nothing is sacred. you have to be willing to make fun of yourself and everyone else around you. and the second you stand up and say "this is wrong because you are insulting something I love or respect or revere" (hello Isaac Hayes!) you are an idiot because you cannot walk both sides of the line. you cannot take a - forgive me for generalizing - 'stereotypical conservative frat guy' stance and say i will only insult fat chicks and gay people because that is the only thing my closed mind really hates - except i do hate other things, but it is currently REALLY politically incorrect to put those things on t-shirts - so instead i'll say terrible things only about groups that are indefensible - groups that i feel could fix themselves but are instead repulsive to me.
and by the by, how into fat chicks and maybe (OH MY GOD!) gay dudes are you if those are the only things you're really afraid of?
i'm sure some day i'll run into the creator of this t-shirt company and he'll be making out with a fat gay dude.
things in life always seem to come around don't they?
ps - i saw a guy yesterday with a "you looked better on myspace" t-shirt - THAT is funny - and probably oh so very true (it definitely is for me).
i consider myself a person not easily offended because in some way life is always funny - i don't care how tragic - there's always funny in there somewhere. there has to be - otherwise how would we possibly get through the day?
a guide for my sense of humor: family guy is hands down the best show on tv. please read into this mostly that i am an equal opportunity offender - nobody is exempt.
so here's the problem - you must make fun of and offend equally - otherwise it just looks petty and 'unfunny'. but this sounds rather serious and 'unfunny' in and of itself doesn't it? i recently lectured (unfairly) my boyfriend for accepting a friend request from a t-shirt company that has a myspace profile, because while some of their t-shirts were funny they seemed to only pick on two groups. fat chicks and gay people. suddenly this doesn't seem funny to me. it's only funny really if you insult everyone - or if you would given the chance.
that is what is so great to me about family guy, south park, aqua teen hunger force, harvey birdman, the daily show, etc. they are equal opportunity offenders. nothing is sacred. you have to be willing to make fun of yourself and everyone else around you. and the second you stand up and say "this is wrong because you are insulting something I love or respect or revere" (hello Isaac Hayes!) you are an idiot because you cannot walk both sides of the line. you cannot take a - forgive me for generalizing - 'stereotypical conservative frat guy' stance and say i will only insult fat chicks and gay people because that is the only thing my closed mind really hates - except i do hate other things, but it is currently REALLY politically incorrect to put those things on t-shirts - so instead i'll say terrible things only about groups that are indefensible - groups that i feel could fix themselves but are instead repulsive to me.
and by the by, how into fat chicks and maybe (OH MY GOD!) gay dudes are you if those are the only things you're really afraid of?
i'm sure some day i'll run into the creator of this t-shirt company and he'll be making out with a fat gay dude.
things in life always seem to come around don't they?
ps - i saw a guy yesterday with a "you looked better on myspace" t-shirt - THAT is funny - and probably oh so very true (it definitely is for me).
addendum to official rant
also, let us just be honest. men have no idea what women really weigh anyway, they only know how we look. how the ass looks, how big or small the tits are blah blah blah. they have no real concept of what 150 pounds looks like on a taller woman versus 110 pounds on a shorter woman. i'm sure every guy in town would be shocked to see the actual weights of the women in their lives. just as we would be shocked to see theirs.
okay, i'm done. i swear
okay, i'm done. i swear
an official rant
so long story short i put up a profile on the village voice personals. it is actually really deceitful of me because i am in a relationship and i plan on deleting it before the weekend is out - basically let's call it a "research tool" and leave it at that. so here's the "rant" part.
body type.
now, i can measure my height and tell you i am 5'9" - there is nothing too subjective about this question. so why on earth do we include such a loaded (and determining question) as body type and then give such innane totally subjective answer options. on the village voice the options are: prefer not to say, average, slim/petite, athletic, ample, a little extra padding, and large - in that order. now for me i can eliminate slim/petite immediately as by pretty clear definition there is nothing petite about 5'9". as for the others - i'm at a loss. i mean statistics show that the "average" woman is about 20 pounds overweight - so is that what we're using as "average" if so, then by definition "a little extra padding" is "a little more than 20 pounds" overweight? i'm guessing when guys check this box for what they're looking for this is not their logic - but i guarantee you it is what happens in a woman's mind when she's trying to determine which stupid box to pick that will likely x her out of a million opportunities in one mouse click. so then what's bigger ample or large? ample in my mind implies a certain voluptuousness and so it sounds smaller or more prettily assembled to me than just LARGE - which sounds like you just described yourself as a an elephant or a maybe a football player. by the microsoft word dictionary Ample is "as much or as many as required, usually with some left over" - sounds like a little extra padding to me! also they list it as "large, especially in physical size (often used euphemistically)". Large is defined as "comparatively big in size or bigger in size than is usual or expected" but they also list is as "tall and well built, heavy set, broad, or overweight (i'll take tall and well built of those four options!). they also list it as "occupying a comparatively big space or bigger space than is usual or expected" which sounds exactly the same as Ample. my favorite definitions for Large are "significant. or general in scope, extent, or effect". also "generous in spirit or attitude".
so with all this research under my belt i go back to trying to pick the one that just feels right - and i got to say - none of them do. and by the by where is the "skinny" option which is a basically a nicer way of saying "crack whore" just as "ample" is a nicer way of saying "fat pig". why if you are slim/petite do you get the simple option of checking "slim/petite" and never thinking about it again and if you are anything other than that you are basically whittled down to badly defined degrees of fatness.
let's not even talk about the myspace options (slim/slender, athletic, average, some extra baggage, more to love, body builder, and no answer - at least the order makes the sizes clear - small, medium, large, extra large, extra extra large, and so fit i am actually super large). i have marked No Answer there as well - i don't feel as badly about it though because in theory this is not a personals page like the village voice is. however, the choices still blow and i don't like having to cop out and say "no answer" - it sounds like i'm afraid of it - when really i'm mostly just afraid of being poorly defined.
the irony of course is that all these words, "average, a little extra padding, more to love, ample, large, etc." are an impressive effort to more honestly include a more realistic cross section of people. but it is really just ineffective. and thus, my rant for today.
body type.
now, i can measure my height and tell you i am 5'9" - there is nothing too subjective about this question. so why on earth do we include such a loaded (and determining question) as body type and then give such innane totally subjective answer options. on the village voice the options are: prefer not to say, average, slim/petite, athletic, ample, a little extra padding, and large - in that order. now for me i can eliminate slim/petite immediately as by pretty clear definition there is nothing petite about 5'9". as for the others - i'm at a loss. i mean statistics show that the "average" woman is about 20 pounds overweight - so is that what we're using as "average" if so, then by definition "a little extra padding" is "a little more than 20 pounds" overweight? i'm guessing when guys check this box for what they're looking for this is not their logic - but i guarantee you it is what happens in a woman's mind when she's trying to determine which stupid box to pick that will likely x her out of a million opportunities in one mouse click. so then what's bigger ample or large? ample in my mind implies a certain voluptuousness and so it sounds smaller or more prettily assembled to me than just LARGE - which sounds like you just described yourself as a an elephant or a maybe a football player. by the microsoft word dictionary Ample is "as much or as many as required, usually with some left over" - sounds like a little extra padding to me! also they list it as "large, especially in physical size (often used euphemistically)". Large is defined as "comparatively big in size or bigger in size than is usual or expected" but they also list is as "tall and well built, heavy set, broad, or overweight (i'll take tall and well built of those four options!). they also list it as "occupying a comparatively big space or bigger space than is usual or expected" which sounds exactly the same as Ample. my favorite definitions for Large are "significant. or general in scope, extent, or effect". also "generous in spirit or attitude".
so with all this research under my belt i go back to trying to pick the one that just feels right - and i got to say - none of them do. and by the by where is the "skinny" option which is a basically a nicer way of saying "crack whore" just as "ample" is a nicer way of saying "fat pig". why if you are slim/petite do you get the simple option of checking "slim/petite" and never thinking about it again and if you are anything other than that you are basically whittled down to badly defined degrees of fatness.
let's not even talk about the myspace options (slim/slender, athletic, average, some extra baggage, more to love, body builder, and no answer - at least the order makes the sizes clear - small, medium, large, extra large, extra extra large, and so fit i am actually super large). i have marked No Answer there as well - i don't feel as badly about it though because in theory this is not a personals page like the village voice is. however, the choices still blow and i don't like having to cop out and say "no answer" - it sounds like i'm afraid of it - when really i'm mostly just afraid of being poorly defined.
the irony of course is that all these words, "average, a little extra padding, more to love, ample, large, etc." are an impressive effort to more honestly include a more realistic cross section of people. but it is really just ineffective. and thus, my rant for today.
bukowski review 4
just received my copy of the spring/summer 2006 issue of the bukowski review - where my poem "chasing bukowski" is published. this was originally to be published in issue 3 last year along with my poem "being bukowski" but somehow it got missed. so here it is now. pick it up. if you can find it. which you probably can't. you know literary magazines - impossible to find unless you subscribe. you can find the bukowski review and pearl here: http://www.pearlmag.com
this is the final issue of the bukowski review - which is too bad - it was a great zine devoted to a great man that changed the whole way people write - it certainly changed the way i write.
my friend justin barrett's work "just some guy" is also featured in this issue - page 27 - check it out.
ps - still trying to write - so still listening to lola...
this is the final issue of the bukowski review - which is too bad - it was a great zine devoted to a great man that changed the whole way people write - it certainly changed the way i write.
my friend justin barrett's work "just some guy" is also featured in this issue - page 27 - check it out.
ps - still trying to write - so still listening to lola...
jon
in a far too belated "review" of jon's Oscar work (jon stewart that is) i have to say i think he did wonderfully. had they let him write the script we would have all enjoyed it more - the improv that were so clearly his were the brightest moments of the night. he loosened up as time went on and whatever people may think i doubt it can be argued that he wasn't an excellent choice for this kind of Oscars. certainly jon hosting a titanic laden Oscars would be a mistake - but for an oscars featuring Brokeback Mountain, Good Night and Good Luck, Munich, Crash, Capote, Syriana, and such he is a great fit. i hope he'll be back despite the terrible numbers. i personally haven't watched the Oscars in years (maybe like 10 years?), but the combination of jon and the kind of films that i adore actually being nominated brought me back.
yes, in some ways i wish i could get back some of the 3 1/2 hours of my life (like the Academy Presidents speech - who was timing that ridiculous bullshit?!) but i was still glad i watched.
i often try to catch the Independent Spirit Awards and i have to say that while i know the world will likely never be the kind of place in my lifetime where the Oscars can be more like the Independent Spirit Awards i sure wish the Oscar people would go to the Independent Spirit Awards and take notes. sarah silverman's opening speech alone was worth it. so funny. she makes a comment (directed specifically to george clooney) about the cleanliness of her vagina. how great is that? george clooney laughed louder and more honestly than i have ever seen anyone laugh on any Oscars footage - ever.
yes, in some ways i wish i could get back some of the 3 1/2 hours of my life (like the Academy Presidents speech - who was timing that ridiculous bullshit?!) but i was still glad i watched.
i often try to catch the Independent Spirit Awards and i have to say that while i know the world will likely never be the kind of place in my lifetime where the Oscars can be more like the Independent Spirit Awards i sure wish the Oscar people would go to the Independent Spirit Awards and take notes. sarah silverman's opening speech alone was worth it. so funny. she makes a comment (directed specifically to george clooney) about the cleanliness of her vagina. how great is that? george clooney laughed louder and more honestly than i have ever seen anyone laugh on any Oscars footage - ever.
apparently i only have things to say about movies and books
this one is brief.
saw The Constant Gardener this week. it was good, but not great. i applaud Meirelles for even trying to follow up City Of God and not becoming one of those brilliant artists that create an equally brilliant "first work" and then disappear off the face of the earth because there is no possible way to follow up a brilliant "first work". i fear if i ever managed to create a brilliant first work (or even a not brilliant first work) i would be one of these artists. so that said, good for him for diving in and doing something at all, let alone something good and worthy.
my biggest complaint about the whole film? who on earth decided that Rachel Weisz (wonderful though she is) could pass for 24? what is the harm in making her 28 (which is still pushing it by the way, but certainly more believable.) she is 35! let her be 35! or at least something believeably similar. hollywood pisses me off. even when it is trying to be wothy and tell an inspiring story it still manages to fuck women up the ass - and not in a good way.
ps - run lola run helps me write. don't know why but it works like a tonic. so back to writing i go...
saw The Constant Gardener this week. it was good, but not great. i applaud Meirelles for even trying to follow up City Of God and not becoming one of those brilliant artists that create an equally brilliant "first work" and then disappear off the face of the earth because there is no possible way to follow up a brilliant "first work". i fear if i ever managed to create a brilliant first work (or even a not brilliant first work) i would be one of these artists. so that said, good for him for diving in and doing something at all, let alone something good and worthy.
my biggest complaint about the whole film? who on earth decided that Rachel Weisz (wonderful though she is) could pass for 24? what is the harm in making her 28 (which is still pushing it by the way, but certainly more believable.) she is 35! let her be 35! or at least something believeably similar. hollywood pisses me off. even when it is trying to be wothy and tell an inspiring story it still manages to fuck women up the ass - and not in a good way.
ps - run lola run helps me write. don't know why but it works like a tonic. so back to writing i go...
ishmael
i can't really explain this book no matter how many times i try to articulate it here. so i will just say that my very good friend xavi gave it to me with this note "This book seriously changed the way I perceive the world's history - nevermind it's a talking gorilla!"
that sums up Ishmael so incredibly. i finished it recently and it took a bit of time to get through it as you really have to pay attention to some of it if you want to connect with it. if you want to allow it to blow your mind. but it did. any book that completely alters the way i think of things by the time i finish it is a fucking masterpiece. even though i already stole from xavi above i am going to steal again from the quote on the front of the book which i feel like he stole from me before i ever thought it, "From now on I will divide the books I have read into two categories - the ones I read before Ishmael and those read after."
it may be what you are looking for. it certainly was what i was looking for.
that sums up Ishmael so incredibly. i finished it recently and it took a bit of time to get through it as you really have to pay attention to some of it if you want to connect with it. if you want to allow it to blow your mind. but it did. any book that completely alters the way i think of things by the time i finish it is a fucking masterpiece. even though i already stole from xavi above i am going to steal again from the quote on the front of the book which i feel like he stole from me before i ever thought it, "From now on I will divide the books I have read into two categories - the ones I read before Ishmael and those read after."
it may be what you are looking for. it certainly was what i was looking for.
yellow
just read this book that kind of blew my mind - actually i read two books recently that blew my mind - but in completely different ways. today i will focus on Yellow. which i just read in one hungry sitting. well, except for the first line that i read months ago when i decided to buy the book. this is a technique i have developed in the last few years for deciding on a book to buy. more and more reading the back of a book jacket makes me want to vomit for its neatly summed up cute as a button and tied with a ribbon synopsis. so i now ignore the jacket entirely. although kudos to those books that manage to do the jacket right - there are a few i've found. my new technique for purchase is as follows: being drawn to the cover immediately, the title, and then the first line of the first page. i used to just pick a page at random and read a line (and this has found me some real gems - including Benjamin Weissman's Headless) but i find (through intense research ;) that the first line is a better indicator than a line picked at random. i have, with this new carefully devised system found some beautiful books that i don't know how i would have otherwise found, and really i can only think of one time that this system has failed me. although that time that it failed, it failed me so totally i was forced to throw the book in the trash. the boyfriend said i should never throw out a book and while i might have agreed before, i had to answer now with, "Nobody Should EVER Read That Book - If By Throwing It In The Trash I Can Stop One Person From Reading It Then I Have Done The World A Favor." I tend towards the dramatic, can you tell? anyway, back to Yellow. i found Yellow by using my system and it is a perfect example of a book i never would have found without the system. the cover was nice, not my favortie, but the title Yellow compensated - i've always loved the color Yellow for some reason and that combined with the oddness and simplicity of it intrigued me. now the first line "The room is filled with the smell of oranges." Nice. Beautiful. Simple. Unique. certainly worth a try - and then on the way out (i.e. in closing the book) i came across this note by the author just after the deditcation. "In my ideal life I am arranged alphabetically. And I am never infected with nostalgia." Really beautiful. and more importantly perhaps, honest. razor blade honest. i love razor blade honest and beautiful at the same time. it is maybe what i crave most in life.
so back to the real point of this - why i was blown away. it was not a revolutionary story or anything so amazing as that - a very simple story about a woman really. but it was beautifully and interestingly written and i think so many women would identify with what Visman (the author) was writing. for me it was like she was looking right into my insides, all the neuroses and paranoia and sickness that people, particularly women i think, live with. the driving constant thumping of something that is wrong that you cannot quite put your finger on. well done.
so back to the real point of this - why i was blown away. it was not a revolutionary story or anything so amazing as that - a very simple story about a woman really. but it was beautifully and interestingly written and i think so many women would identify with what Visman (the author) was writing. for me it was like she was looking right into my insides, all the neuroses and paranoia and sickness that people, particularly women i think, live with. the driving constant thumping of something that is wrong that you cannot quite put your finger on. well done.
neil labute is a golden god
neil labute is a golden god.
i have read a lot of his work in the past including his short story collection, but i just read Fat Pig today, and it is just so insightful. i love that labute does not seem to feel the need to write hundred plus page manifestos. that he is simple and direct. his clarity and the very razor sharpness that he must edit himself with is so brilliant. i dream of writing in this way - unfortunately i tend to either run off at the mouth (in email and blog format particularly it seems) or i suspect my work is brief because i simply do not dig deep enough (my novels, scripts, and short fiction particularly) and not because i have some kind of highly tuned ability to censure myself.
oddly my graphic novel draft is a hefty 170 page nightmare opus. don't know where that one came from...
i have read a lot of his work in the past including his short story collection, but i just read Fat Pig today, and it is just so insightful. i love that labute does not seem to feel the need to write hundred plus page manifestos. that he is simple and direct. his clarity and the very razor sharpness that he must edit himself with is so brilliant. i dream of writing in this way - unfortunately i tend to either run off at the mouth (in email and blog format particularly it seems) or i suspect my work is brief because i simply do not dig deep enough (my novels, scripts, and short fiction particularly) and not because i have some kind of highly tuned ability to censure myself.
oddly my graphic novel draft is a hefty 170 page nightmare opus. don't know where that one came from...
movie etiquette 101
after posting the last blog i was reminded of something that happened at my double header theater trip on sunday (the movies were both so good i blocked it out temporarily - but it has now returned). my first instinct is to just rant it out - but i think it will be more humourously illustrated by the following:
Scene: Boyfriend and me sitting quietly, occasionally whispering, almost silently to each other. two girls - we will creatively call them "Girl 1" and "Girl 2" - sit down behind us just prior to the lights going down.
Commercials begin on the screen
Girl 1: blahblahblahblahblabhoahablahblah
Girl 2: blah blah blah
(the above stimulating conversation continued throughout the commercials)
Girl 1: blahblahblahblahblahblahblahablabheytyblahblah
Girl 2: blah blah
Previews now running on the screen
Girl 1: blahblahblahblahblahblahblahblahblahblah
Girl 2: blah
(the above stimulating conversation continued throughout)
Now Brokeback Mountain has started - it is already quiet and stunning
Girl 1: blah blah blah blah blah
Girl 2: blah
My Boyfriend: You're not going to talk through the whole movie are you?
Girl 1: You're not going to be TALL through the whole movie are YOU?
My Boyfriend: (said brilliantly) YOU sat behind ME.
My boyfriend now turns around to resume watching the movie he has paid about 22 bucks for us to see.
Girl 1: Wow - way to be another RUDE American.
End Scene.
WE are the rude americans?!?!?!?! Are you FUCKING kidding me?!?!?!?!?! another american without the attention span of a lab rat - what a surprise...
so here is the lesson kids...i'm sure all of you that got this far already got it - but for the slow kids in the back...if you feel like talking, go to a coffee shop, the park, a mall, a restaurant, your HOME, i don't care - just PLEASE don't go to the god damn movies!
well i tried not to rant - but it just kinda ran away with me at the end there...
Scene: Boyfriend and me sitting quietly, occasionally whispering, almost silently to each other. two girls - we will creatively call them "Girl 1" and "Girl 2" - sit down behind us just prior to the lights going down.
Commercials begin on the screen
Girl 1: blahblahblahblahblabhoahablahblah
Girl 2: blah blah blah
(the above stimulating conversation continued throughout the commercials)
Girl 1: blahblahblahblahblahblahblahablabheytyblahblah
Girl 2: blah blah
Previews now running on the screen
Girl 1: blahblahblahblahblahblahblahblahblahblah
Girl 2: blah
(the above stimulating conversation continued throughout)
Now Brokeback Mountain has started - it is already quiet and stunning
Girl 1: blah blah blah blah blah
Girl 2: blah
My Boyfriend: You're not going to talk through the whole movie are you?
Girl 1: You're not going to be TALL through the whole movie are YOU?
My Boyfriend: (said brilliantly) YOU sat behind ME.
My boyfriend now turns around to resume watching the movie he has paid about 22 bucks for us to see.
Girl 1: Wow - way to be another RUDE American.
End Scene.
WE are the rude americans?!?!?!?! Are you FUCKING kidding me?!?!?!?!?! another american without the attention span of a lab rat - what a surprise...
so here is the lesson kids...i'm sure all of you that got this far already got it - but for the slow kids in the back...if you feel like talking, go to a coffee shop, the park, a mall, a restaurant, your HOME, i don't care - just PLEASE don't go to the god damn movies!
well i tried not to rant - but it just kinda ran away with me at the end there...
disturbing behavior
know that subject line was juicy...the content is less so. sorry to disappoint :)
basically the highly mediocre movie Disturbing Behavior is on TNT right now and i'm immediately reminiscent that it was the first movie i ever saw with my boyfriend, and in fact it is the first night we ever officially met, way back in the summer of 1998, way back when we were just friends, way back when i fantisized he'd be into me and he fantisized about others (well at that time one very specific other). it's funny, i remember so clearly how much i liked him right away, and how we didn't stop talking (except during the movie since that would be rude even in a highly mediocre movie such as Disturbing Behavior) and even though all that memory is so clear like looking at freshly cut glass, I can't remember what we talked about, I supoose because the content was likely so unimportant and fleeting, but i remember vividly - to this day - a good eight years later exactly how i felt. it's still how i feel, maybe just with a slightly different perspective.
basically the highly mediocre movie Disturbing Behavior is on TNT right now and i'm immediately reminiscent that it was the first movie i ever saw with my boyfriend, and in fact it is the first night we ever officially met, way back in the summer of 1998, way back when we were just friends, way back when i fantisized he'd be into me and he fantisized about others (well at that time one very specific other). it's funny, i remember so clearly how much i liked him right away, and how we didn't stop talking (except during the movie since that would be rude even in a highly mediocre movie such as Disturbing Behavior) and even though all that memory is so clear like looking at freshly cut glass, I can't remember what we talked about, I supoose because the content was likely so unimportant and fleeting, but i remember vividly - to this day - a good eight years later exactly how i felt. it's still how i feel, maybe just with a slightly different perspective.
oops
already with the mistakes.
i completely forgot to add Broken Flowers to the "list of great films" i posted yesterday. great film. check it out if you haven't already.
i completely forgot to add Broken Flowers to the "list of great films" i posted yesterday. great film. check it out if you haven't already.
brokeback capote
saw Brokeback Mountain and Capote yesterday - double header - of two really great films. seeing them both made me reflect on how many great movies i've seen in the theater in the last year, here's a list of the really truly great ones - there are a few at the bottom that weren't bad but i certainly wouldn't catalog as "great".
So here's the great ones: Syriana, The Squid & The Whale, Crash, Good Night and Good Luck, Brokeback Mountain, Capote, Match Point, Wallace & Gromit: The Curse of the Were-Rabbit, and Grizzly Man.
Movies that tried really hard and weren't bad, but just didn't get there for me this year would include: A History Of Violence, Walk The Line, Corpse Bride, Batman Begins, and March Of The Penguins.
if i could add Munich, Paradise Now, and The New World to my list of "seen" i would feel like i did a pretty good job this year - considering i uprooted myself in april and have been a bit busy getting re-rooted - is re-rooted even a word?
of course if i could get the 2 hours of my life back that i wasted on Kingdom Of Heaven that would be bliss. in sera's and my defense it was pouring rain in NYC and we had no place to go...although still...i'd maybe rather have the memory of waiting in the surprisingly icy spring rain for two hours with not a goddamn thing to do than the memory of wishing i could gouge out my own eyes.
So here's the great ones: Syriana, The Squid & The Whale, Crash, Good Night and Good Luck, Brokeback Mountain, Capote, Match Point, Wallace & Gromit: The Curse of the Were-Rabbit, and Grizzly Man.
Movies that tried really hard and weren't bad, but just didn't get there for me this year would include: A History Of Violence, Walk The Line, Corpse Bride, Batman Begins, and March Of The Penguins.
if i could add Munich, Paradise Now, and The New World to my list of "seen" i would feel like i did a pretty good job this year - considering i uprooted myself in april and have been a bit busy getting re-rooted - is re-rooted even a word?
of course if i could get the 2 hours of my life back that i wasted on Kingdom Of Heaven that would be bliss. in sera's and my defense it was pouring rain in NYC and we had no place to go...although still...i'd maybe rather have the memory of waiting in the surprisingly icy spring rain for two hours with not a goddamn thing to do than the memory of wishing i could gouge out my own eyes.
blog narcissist
so as per tradition, here i am, popping yet another cherry in life, far too late in life. at least this time i had a good reason to wait. i've argued for a long time with many in my life about the pointlessness of the whole blog/live journal/friendsite thing as just an incredible waste of time and yet another in a long line of ways to keep us (more to the point - me) from doing what needs to be done in life (finish the novel, finish the graphic novel, finish the flash animation, even start the dreaded treadmill, whatever, pick your poison). yet here i am. narcissistically posting photos and writing about myself under the guise of i don't even know what (i mean really - i posted like 5 gazillion photos - i just love those ones with the pink wig - couldn't help myself).
but today i woke up with a new thought (yes, yes we can call it a rationalization if you'd prefer) it really is a great way to keep in touch with all my friends that are far too far away. and since the move to nyc that is all i have it seems - work and friends that are way too far away. also, i really do enjoy reading the blogs of those far away friends (kyle's especially) and i am throughly disappointed when they abrubtly stop (kyle that's you again). so maybe this is not just a narcisssistic exercise in talking about myself and posting tons of photos...maybe this is a good way for friends to check up on me and get to read a bit about what's going on way over here where i am (well that still sounds narcissistic - but less overtly so).
so the optimist in me decided to give it a try today. so tune in when you get a chance and i'll do my best to keep posting when i have something of value to say...which may not be often...so maybe i'll post even if i've got nothin'. guess we'll all find out together. those of you that are so missed know who you are, so stay tuned...maybe you'll make a cameo in an otherwise calculating exercise in narcissism.
- ps - i used some version of the word narcissicist in this blog 4 times - what the hell does that say?!
but today i woke up with a new thought (yes, yes we can call it a rationalization if you'd prefer) it really is a great way to keep in touch with all my friends that are far too far away. and since the move to nyc that is all i have it seems - work and friends that are way too far away. also, i really do enjoy reading the blogs of those far away friends (kyle's especially) and i am throughly disappointed when they abrubtly stop (kyle that's you again). so maybe this is not just a narcisssistic exercise in talking about myself and posting tons of photos...maybe this is a good way for friends to check up on me and get to read a bit about what's going on way over here where i am (well that still sounds narcissistic - but less overtly so).
so the optimist in me decided to give it a try today. so tune in when you get a chance and i'll do my best to keep posting when i have something of value to say...which may not be often...so maybe i'll post even if i've got nothin'. guess we'll all find out together. those of you that are so missed know who you are, so stay tuned...maybe you'll make a cameo in an otherwise calculating exercise in narcissism.
- ps - i used some version of the word narcissicist in this blog 4 times - what the hell does that say?!
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